Take my Advice..

I am nearing the end of my degree and as I am approaching graduation, I am getting this apprehensive fear of the future.

apprehensive-young-woman

When I was little, and the elders used to ask “So, what you are going to be when you grow up?”, everyone else was rattling off their career aspirations and hobbies and I would have no clue. I would blurt out “teacher” when my turn came but that was only to get everyone off my back because everyone else would be peering into my face or repeating the question until I gave an answer. Growing up, I felt weird among my friends because they knew what to do whereas I didn’t have a single clue. My mum would put my worries to rest by assuring me that I would figure it out when the time came. And then as I passed from one year level to the next, the pressure of an ever growing mountain of classwork, homework, getting highest grades and getting into a medical degree just kept mounting up. I had no time to think, no time to sit back and relax and think about what I actually saw myself doing in the next few years. WAIT!!WAIT!!HOLD UP!!PAUSE!!GO BACK!!!MEDICAL DEGREE?? WHERE DID THAT COME FROM??? That’s right. I didn’t know when it happened, but suddenly I was telling everyone that I wanted to become a doctor. No wait, everyone else was telling me that I was going to become a doctor. And even though I get nauseous when I see blood, suddenly I was working hard to get ATAR score of 99.99 to get into medicine. Everyone else was telling everybody else about me aiming for medicine but no one was telling me how to achieve that dream. No one wanted to tell me. No one wanted competition buildup for their kids. No one wanted their suggestion to be taken in the wrong way if things didn’t turn out right. Everyone kept mum. Now if you recall, I had arrived Australia like a year and a half ago. I had no clue about the workings. I had no clue about getting tuitions. I had no clue where or who to go to for tuitions. I had no one to guide me, no one to coach me, no one to tell me what units to take. That I could have taken Biology and still gotten into medicine. No,everyone assured me that taking 2 maths units, physics and chemistry was the way to go. That subjects that I would drown in would help me in getting into medicine. That studying whole textbooks all by MYSELF was what every student does. Little did I know everyone else was going for tuitions.

I did not get 99.95. I did not get into medicine. I did not meet the demands of what desi community had placed onto me.

cry gif

I got into Bachelors of Science (Biotechnology). At every desi party I would be the target of aunties clicking their tongue in sympathy for my failure. I would feel down, I felt I had let my parents down, my relatives down, the whole of India down. Aunties would surround me and question my errors and interview my faults because they wanted to avoid the pitfalls that I had fallen into during my journey. They wanted to know what shortcuts they could take for their kids based on my shortcomings.

3 years later…

I attend a party and see this aunty whom I haven’t seen for long. I go to her and chat with her and ask about what has been happening. Apparently her elder daughter was in year 12 and she had stopped attending parties to concentrate on her studies. I asked whether she is still pursuing the dream of doctor and aunty exclaims “Doctor?? No waayy!!! I don’t want my daughter to become doctor. Do you know they have to do night shifts as part of degree? It is very unsafe for girls. Do you know its a 5 year degree? Too lengthy!!And plus my daughter doesn’t have interest in medicine. She told me she wants to become a teacher. I also like that. Best job for girls.” I look around and see all aunties nodding their head in unison.

I lose consciousness.

Merida_faint

*** All images and gifs via Google Images.

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23 thoughts on “Take my Advice..

    1. Exactly.
      That is such a beautiful thought. My mum too always taught us to be good human beings first and she never placed value of a profession to status which is what everyone does these days. Thanks for stopping by Tanveer 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  1. This is actually the trend over here. Study whatever you want and get a grad school degree, preferably, a PhD. Voila! You are a teacher and you won’t have to do night shifts.
    If only someone had told me this.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Really? It already has become a trend? My friends and I were discussing getting PhD’s in the long run so you know you get a Dr. to your name haha. Because really, if you are not one (albeit fake), have you really accomplished life?
      Its not too late to do your PhD. Actually it never really is. But my personal advice is to grab on to that job you got. You might be jumping up the status and position ladder in the years that you would be getting PhD.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, a lot of my friends are going for PhDs. But I agree with your viewpoint, otherwise, I would be Dr Ershad Hussain by now. However, teaching is fun. I had a short stint a few years back. It’s nerve-racking but there is a sense of accomplishment if you do it the right way.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Oh really? So you taught? What did you teach? Chemistry 😛 haha
        Same here. I like teaching too. I never knew what I wanted to do in my life as a career and I used to and still tutor part time and I realised I actually really really enjoyed it.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Aaah right. May I ask why did you stop? As in the cons of teaching? Or was it because of your present job?
        I tutor school level english. Essays. Majoring in essays lol. And its easy. But I would love to teach uni tertiary level.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. It was a temp job and this one is permanent. It’s not easy to land a job these days. Besides all those years of studying required for a teaching post discouraged me somewhat.
        English. Now that’s great. I have fond memories of English classes. Not that I had any aptitude in the subject, but almost all of my teachers were memorable. Essays are tough though.

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Yes you are right. It is really hard to land a job which is why I said its better you stick to it rather than the PhD. When I started Biotech everyone said it had good scope and now everyone says the exact opposite, that there aren’t much Biotech jobs here in Aus but its good in India and America. If I land up in India then I might pursue my dream careerz
        Same. My English teachers were really supportive and helpful. I was the only one who enjoyed English classes and hence labelled “teacher’s pet”

        Liked by 1 person

      6. I’m sure things will open up for you when the time comes. I believe if you are good, you will find something sooner or later.
        Oh, enjoyed English classes for all the wrong reasons, but let’s not get into that. “A teacher’s pet” huh? You would be exactly the kind of student my friends and I would secretly makes jokes about. Haha. Just kidding!

        Liked by 1 person

      7. Yeah that’s what someone else told me as well and it gives me hope.
        How can English be enjoyed for wrong reasons?
        Hahaha yup. I know I know and I don’t mind. Just English tho. Remaining classes I made fun of other teacher’s pets especially for maths. This girl used to remind maths sir that he had assigned homework and don’t you hate it when you haven’t done it and sir had forgotten about it and this frickin monster would be itching to tell sir coz she finished it and no one else did? I wasn’t that cruel.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. LOL loved the post!

    I’m gonna be honest here… and this may come from being a hardcore humanities student, but the worst part isn’t the aunties; it’s the children who actually agree with the aunties! It’s the idea that some degrees are more prestigious than others, and that you should aim for those at all costs. When I’ve mentioned my field to younger cousins studying engineering or similar, they’ve ridiculed it. But a Swede would never do that. So where does that come from but their parents?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hmm true that. I haven’t yet encountered with species of the second kind as in generation lol. I mean all the aunties have kids younger than me who are just maturing now. But yeah I get the vibe of a career being more prestigious than others

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I wish I would have gone for something that I was interested in. Something that is less tiring for me. Sometimes I regret taking up engineering but who knows maybe Allah has plans for me 🙂 So allhamdulilah for everything. But I will definitely guide others to follow their passion and also tell them to check your post 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I love this. Always remember to go for your passion though, regardless of what other people think. They’re not going to be the ones providing for you and your family, you are. Good luck for the rest of your degree and all the best for your graduation!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wish I had realised what you said earlier but alhumdulillah Allah is the Greatest Planner and he had planned Biotechnology for me. Which I am enjoying. But yeah another thing I would tell my 18 year old self would be your above advice 😉

      Like

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